Hi everyone,
Wow! We were sure busy in today's lesson. We had a lot to cover, but we got through everything. We'll have a short review of paraphrasing in next week's lesson to reinforce this new writing skill. Body Paragraphs: We had a short review of how to organize your ideas in your body paragraphs. Once again, you will need to use funnel organization. This means that information is arranged in this way: a. general --> topic sentence with subtopic b. less general --> supporting ideas c. specific --> details We also reviewed the different types of details that you can use in your body paragraph: a. expert opinions b. statistics c. descriptions d. facts Keep in mind that descriptions and facts over overlap with each other. Many writers often use facts in their descriptions. Paraphrasing: We also learned about paraphrasing in today's class. This is another way we can include information into our research papers from our sources. When you paraphrase, you put the author’s ideas into your own words. Even if you want to use general facts from your source, you still have to paraphrase this information. Remember that some paraphrases need in-text citation and some paraphrases do not require it.
Before you paraphrase, you have to identify shared language (= words that you cannot change) and find synonyms for words that you can change. This is the most important step in writing a good paraphrase. This is a difficult skill to master and it often takes a long time to paraphrase information. I even have trouble paraphrasing when I have to prepare research papers, too. Be patient and don’t give up! Outlines: We also looked at how to prepare an outline. For your outlines, you need to include: a. Topic sentences (in sentence-form) b: supporting ideas (two for each body paragraph) c. details (2 details for each supporting idea). Remember that you can use note-form for your supporting ideas and details. You don't have to use sentence-form. For your outlines, you need to download the "Outline Template" from the Writing-->Persuasion Essay section on the website. It has also been uploaded in a file at the end of today's lesson summary. Homework: 1. Blog Comment #8 2. Complete Outline
Blog Question #8: Read through your feedback on your introduction. The blue comments/corrections are for content/structure; and the red comments are for grammar. Which three comments/corrections are the most important for you to help you write your body paragraphs? Why? *Write 8-10 sentences. *Use capitalization, punctuation & spelling correctly. *Submit by Tuesday, June 22 by 6:00pm.
14 Comments
IE3-Aira
6/19/2015 09:34:36 pm
Three corrections which I thought will help my body paragraph are examples, avoid first person and writing general facts.
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IE3W-Chinatsu
6/20/2015 03:36:31 pm
I think that the three corrections which is important for me to write the body paragraph are: including the in-text citation for an unknown fact, to use the grammar correctly and to make the sentence short by using shared languages.
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IE3W-Midori
6/20/2015 06:24:38 pm
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IE3W-Fumio
6/21/2015 09:04:42 am
This time I inserted an irrelevant sentence in my introduction and the comment said I should cut it out and told what I should write instead. I think that is the most important comment for me to help me write the body paragraphs. It is because now I have some more idea what to write and what not to write in the body paragraph.
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IE3W-Takahide
6/21/2015 09:07:44 am
I think all the feedbacks are important. I thought deeply which type of comment was most important but it made me realize that every type is essential and important. For example, grammar is important ofcourse to make sure the sentences make sense. Word choices as well to make the reader interested in the essay. Also, giving us new ideas is very helpful to re-write the halfway finished sentences and to write the continuation of the essay. Moreover, comments that tell us good points make us happy and increases our motivation. For these reasons, all the comments are helpful and important. Therefore, it is very difficult to decide on which comment is the most helpful comment.
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IE3W-Shusei
6/21/2015 09:28:09 pm
As usual, I made many grammar mistakes so I need to be careful next time.
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IE3W-WilliamHaruki
6/22/2015 04:16:52 am
Three points that I need to be careful about when writing my body paragraphs are: avoiding writing in first person; avoiding using unclear word choices; and to write CDs instead of CD's.
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IE3W-Kana
6/22/2015 12:06:33 pm
One of the corrections that was important for me to write my body paragraphs is that I need to use a capital "A" for "Article 9". Since Article 9 is a proper noun, I need to use capital letters for it. I should keep this in mind since there are going to be a lot of proper nouns in my body paragraphs.
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IE3W-Mio
6/22/2015 12:16:14 pm
The three most important comments that I have to keep in mind is that give examples of countries, give specific reasons and don't write information that doesn't directly connect to my opinion.
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IE3W-Soichiro
6/22/2015 01:05:49 pm
What I should be aware of most is not to use irrelevant information in my sentences. I tend to get sidetracked and start writing about other things, so I would like to consentrate on what I am writing at all times. Also, I need proper information. If the information I made a research on is incorrect, people who read my essay will get false information on the topic, and there will be no meaning on writing the whole thing. Finally, must make my position clear and start on my writing. If I do not have a clear view on the topic, I will not be able to make correct suggestions, so I would like to look through my theme again. A persuasion essay is ment to persuade other people on what yot think about. I would like to keep that in mind and write my essay.
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IE3W-Yuto
6/22/2015 01:08:18 pm
I have not received my corrections yet, but I believe that I have not inserted a in-text citation. I probably did not insert a citation in general. I also need to keep in mind that I have to write clearly about the reasons why I am in position of approving lowering the drinking and smoking age down to 18 years old in Japan. In my future writing, I would need to research more about the reason why drinking and smoking age could be lowered.
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IE-W Azusa
6/22/2015 02:22:08 pm
As I did in the last essay, I made a lot of grammatical mistakes and word organizing mistakes. For example, I wrote charging fee for ambulance. But, I found that it is more easier to just write “to introduce ambulance fee" or “ambulance fee" from your corrections.
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IE3W-Aoi
6/22/2015 03:29:35 pm
I think the most important comment for me to help me write body paragraphs is to pay attention to my use of subjects. I didn't care so much about it when I wrote introduction. So it was hard to know what I wanted the focus of my sentences to be.
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IE3W-Tomomi
6/22/2015 03:49:04 pm
Firstly, I have to avoid using first person. I have made the same mistakes in my first essay too. I keep on forgetting it so this time I'd like to make sure not to.
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